Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
