apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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