fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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