I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
me + whiskey = a bad person
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
