my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
