I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
