i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
