a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Send help, water and tortillas.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
