Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
