But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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