what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I look excited, but its just a facade.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize