Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize