I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
The power of my boobs compel you
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize