frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
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