is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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