it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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