why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize