I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
