I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
