sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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