i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
