no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I need water and some morals
Randomize
