I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
