everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
