I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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