Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
