break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Randomize
