you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
