and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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