Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
