well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
