hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He shit in the fireplace
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
