I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
