Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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