no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize