so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
It was confusing and full of hummus
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
