I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
