You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
