i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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