i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
