My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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