I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
