Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
i think i just lost a toe
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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