But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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