one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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