I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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