these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize