Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
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