yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
