Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
