Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
